Shunning
If the ANTM was only about unique doctrine, that would be cause for concern from a theological perspective, but most former members wouldn’t think another thing of it after leaving, to be honest. But the control that the current members are under reaches out and pulls the heart out of former members in an ongoing manner through the painful act of shunning.
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Shunning is found in Amish communities, Jehovah’s Witnesses, some United Pentecostal Churches and increasingly in some pockets of independent Christian churches, where a controlling, charismatic leader is at the helm.
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The Amish community also refers to this practice as shunning. However, in the Jehovah's Witness, this punishment is known as being disfellowshipped. Scientology calls it disconnection. In the ANTM, using the term shunning is seen as derogatory, since they associate it with other cult groups. They typically describe the practice as "disfellowshipped" or "cutting someone off". But it is shunning, nonetheless.
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Shunning severity has varied in the ANTM in the past based on how loyal and plugged in the current member is, and how big a role that the former member played in the life of the church. Shunning has waxed and waned in enforcement over the years and has ranged from limiting contact to family to just on major holidays, all the way to its current policy of complete disconnection from the family with a refusal to even acknowledge their existence. There were times where limited, light conversation was tolerated, as long as church topics were taken off the table. But as the church has grown more isolated in attempts to maintain control and limit exposure to truths about the church from outside sources, which has resulted in many families leaving in recent years, the practice has intensified.
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A mom and dad have been forbidden to attend a son or daughter’s wedding. Children have been forbidden to attend a parent’s funeral. A birth of a grandchild, a school play, a high school graduation, all lost due to the act of shunning.
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Why is shunning such a crucial practice in the ANTM? Mainly, it is used as a means of control; to keep current members in because they are afraid to leave and lose relationships with all their friends and family. Members equate leaving the church to leaving God. They see breaking a church membership commitment as being on par with breaking a marriage covenant. They believe that removing yourself from the leadership’s covering exposes you to a “spirit of deception” and so for current members to avoid being tainted by that spirit, former members are to be avoided.
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As with most askew doctrines, shunning is justified by looking at verses out of context and without the balance of other scriptures. I once knew a man who literally plucked out his eye to follow Jesus’ command to remove your eye if it offends you. Sounds silly and naïve, doesn't it. I would say, no more silly than plucking out your family, who loves you, from your life, just because they do not attend church with you anymore. Sometimes scriptures can be misapplied when their original intent is missed, when application is meant to be figurative and not literal, when the particular audience to whom a passage is written is not understood, when their context is lost. Basic rules of bible interpretation are often ignored in this group and it leads to practices that make the member in the end being as far away from principles of grace, mercy, longsuffering and reconciliation as the east is from the west.
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Deuteronomy 13 is often pulled out (one of their publications ‘The Apostolic Sword and Trowel’ had an entire issue devoted to the subject) as a justification to shun. The passage talks about apostates who encourage the faithful to follow after “other gods”. The passage encourages the apostate’s family members to be the first to stone the heretic and the family is even commanded not to pity him. This powerful passage allows current members to feel like they are doing God’s will in shunning family. The painful sacrifice they make in cutting off family is seen as an offering to God, something that they will be rewarded for in eternity.
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ANTMers equate a person who has a different view on any point of doctrine or practice, that causes the person to no longer attend the ANTM church as someone who is going after “other gods”. To put it bluntly, that's a real stretch. Former members are indeed varied in their faith, post-ANTM, but most are a part of Christian churches, worshiping Jehovah, the same God that ANTMers pray to. They are not following after other gods. Since they are not following after other gods, even following this Old Testament passage literally, former ANTM members who are still believers in Jehovah have no reason to be shunned.
Making “other gods” metaphorical for different doctrinal positions or different church practices or different apostolic covering, goes way beyond what the scripture teaches. That's why deep in their hearts, those who are shunning former members have that gnawing empty feeling in their gut that they are doing something wrong.
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There are also other Old Testament passages that command a parent to kill a child for disobedience. Why selectively carry out one command versus another? Why not cut off a disobedient child? When interpretations are applied selectively, and without understanding of their true intent, people get hurt.
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It should be noted that there are churches that practice church disfellowshipping and excommunication. These restrictions in contact are limited in scope, however, to church related activities. The act of shunning by contrast is treating the individual as if they are dead, as if they don't exist.
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The ANTM enforces shunning of members who simply stop attending the church, after it is clear they do not plan to return. These are people who have not sinned, but instead "broke a church commitment" and "removed themselves from the 'body' ". They may disagree with a point of doctrine in their conscience. They may miss other shunned family. They may just be tired of trying to live up to all of the additional 'laws' that the ANTM has added to a walk with Christ. None of these reasons are valid to leadership. There is really no way for a committed member to leave the church without being shunned. And so these bible believing, born again Christians are being shunned by family because leadership is afraid that ongoing relationships with family with possibly pull other members out.
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Think about those in the bible who "deserved" shunning: Judas in his betrayal of Christ; Peter in his denial of Christ; the woman caught in adultery. Now think about Jesus' response: He called Judas friend; He cooked Peter breakfast; He told the woman, "where are your accusers?". The way that the ANTM practices shunning is not Christ-like.
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If you are one who is currently shunning family who loves you and would gladly receive you back with tears and open arms, then please reach out to them, restore your relationship with them while there is still time. You will find that is what Jesus would do. After all, didn't He come to His enemies and pursue a relationship with them? Romans 5:8,10 But God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us...10 For if while we were enemies we were reconciled to God by the death of his Son, much more, now that we are reconciled, shall we be saved by his life. (ESV)
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To see the similarities in the ANTM's abusive practice of shunning and that of other organizations, please explore the following links below:
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